Charles "Charlie" Rutherford Kelly is the janitor of Paddy's Pub. He is a member of the Gang that works at the bar, and is considered the "wild card" of the group. Charlie is best friends with Dennis and Mac, knowing the latter since childhood. He shares an apartment with Frank Reynolds, who is very likely his biological father.
Charlie is a co-owner of Paddy's Pub, but he sold most of his shares to Dennis and Mac for, among other things, half a sandwich ("The Gang Sells Out"). The most tedious and disgusting janitorial tasks at the bar are referred to as Charlie Work, even when Charlie is temporarily spared from performing them.
Charlie is known for his illiteracy, his habit of slipping into a variety of characters for his various schemes, and his never ending obsession with The Waitress (until season 12 episode 10, "Dennis' Double Life" when he finds out what it's like being in a relationship with her. After they break up, he continues his obsession). Although he is by most respects the stupidest member of the Gang, he is capable of rare, impressive moments of brilliance, particularly with music and engineering complex social schemes.
Charlie is portrayed by Charlie Day.
- 1 Physical appearance
- 2 Personality
- 3 Early life
- 4 Skills and abilities
- 5 Weaknesses
- 6 Relationships
- 7 Appearances
- 8 Trivia
- 9 Images
- 10 See Also
Physically, Charlie is a man of short stature; being the shortest member of the Gang until Frank's arrival, something he is self conscious about. He has green eyes, and unkempt hair, as well as a scruffy beard. He is on the thin side, though Dee considers him fat, ("Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass") and he once described himself as the "funny fat friend."("Dennis and Dee's Mom Is Dead")
Charlie has horrible personal hygiene, due to only bathing with a sink ("Charlie Gets Crippled") on a non-regular basis ("The Gang Dances Their Asses Off"). Other characters often comment on his smell and even claim to see lice. Charlie poorly denies it when confronted, and shows no qualms with wearing the same clothes, often filthy from work, for days. Many people, himself included, have claimed he sweats significantly more than the average person.
He mainly wears old secondhand T-shirts, some more notable ones being shirts for "Magna", "San Juan, Washington", "O'Keefe Brewery", and "Eleven Point River". In earlier seasons he wore short sleeve polo shirts as well. For pants he wears baggy ripped jeans, and has a pair of beige khaki cutoffs for shorts. His most iconic and oft worn article of clothing, however, is his green army fatigue shirt-jacket with the specialty mark of a United States Navy Aviation Electronics Technician and a Ruptured Duck patch, which gets more decrepit and ripped as the show goes on. He has also worn his grey MacGregor hoodie since season one, and began wearing a black and red Adidas track jacket with a VA-65 Tigers patch from season 2 on; these three remain constant staples of his wardrobe and serve as an example of Charlie's poverty.
A commonly seen outfit is his "bird law" lawyer get up; a short sleeve button up, clip on tie, and beige khakis. For nicer occasions such as a dinner to Guigino's or a high school reunion, he wears a white dress shirt and over-sized corduroy blazer along with his jeans and sneakers.
Charlie has a tattoo on his left forearm which says "BAD NEW", done by himself with ink and a paper clip to look more "hard" in "Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad". Presumably it was meant to say "BAD NEWS", but was interrupted before it could be completed or more likely he misspelled it.
Charlie's main shoes are a pair of suede high top Vans with red soles and linings, which he seemingly wears no matter the occasion Given his concern that Dee's size 13 feet (size 11 in men's) will stretch his sneakers out, his shoe size is likely a 10.5 at most.("Thunder Gun Express")
Charlie's signature attire is his pajamas: a holey black t-shirt depicting a shiny black horse, and an old pair of long thermal underwear paired with old school basketball socks. This is due to his apartment not having heat, causing a drop in temperature at night. ("Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life")
Like the others, Charlie possesses several narcissistic characteristics. He never admits ignorance on any subject, despite being ignorant of just about everything, and often acts like he knows better than others. He tends to try and demonstrate his knowledge by throwing out terms associated with the subject in question, or simply mirroring what other people are saying, without any real understanding.
When called out on his painfully obvious illiteracy and general lack of intelligence, he gets incredibly defensive and angry. He also has a problem with authority, and often ignores the gang's attempts to control his dysfunctional behavior. He also appears to have pica, consuming objects such as paint, cat food, and wolf hair.
Though his general intelligence, logic and grip on reality seem to be sorely deficient, Charlie is actually one of the most socially skilled and aware members of the gang, though this is not saying much. He frequently displays a greater awareness of, and concern for, social taboos, such as what is racist or anti-Semitic, than other members of the gang, particularly Mac and Dee. He also has a talent for manipulating other people when he puts his mind to it (chief examples being his intricate, Machiavellian schemes in Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom and Charlie and Dee Find Love), suggesting he possesses the keen psychological insight required to do so, thus causing many to ask how smart Charlie truly is.
Delusions of grandeur
Whenever the Gang begins a new scheme, Charlie often expects to be placed in a position of authority, such as being Dennis's campaign manager in "The Gang Runs for Office" or being captain of the boat in "The Gang Buys a Boat", despite being woefully unsuited for them.
When denied something he wants, he will usually attempt to get it anyway through deceit and manipulation, never taking responsibility for the havoc he always causes as a result. This is most notably seen in his (often criminal) persistence to woo The Waitress, who refuses to give him the time of day. Even when directly told his ideas are wrong or bad, he refuses to leave them behind, often attempting a compromise or outright denying his errors - for example, when told that the twist in The Sixth Sense was not that the main character was played by Bruce Willis, he tried to claim that the film had multiple twists. ("Mac and Charlie Write a Movie")
Like Dennis, Charlie's delusions of superiority and emotional volatility seem to cover up a deep-seated sense of shame and low self-esteem. His fits of rage often spring up when he senses he is being attacked, wronged or not listened to. The disproportionate amount of anger and the lengths Charlie goes to avenge himself against slights real and imagined suggest that on a subconscious level he is miserably aware and ashamed of his failings, and hates to be reminded of it.
Charlie has a tendency to dress up as characters and lose himself in fantasies based on movies he's seen. In some cases, a subtle reference to a movie is made without Charlie explicitly referencing the character. He has dressed up and pretended to be the following characters:
- Vietnam War veteran Ron Kovic from Born on the Fourth of July ("Charlie Gets Crippled")
- Corruption-fighting police officer Serpico played by Al Pacino ("Bums: Making a Mess All Over the City")
- Musician Bob Dylan when getting ready to perform a song ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person")
- Hoss Bonaventure, a stereotypical rich Texas oilman, first seen when selling gasoline door-to-door ("The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis"), and then again on a blind date ("Frank's Pretty Woman")
- Charlie has a nervous breakdown similar to John Nash in A Beautiful Mind and imagines a huge conspiracy is happening around him ("Sweet Dee Has a Heart Attack").
- Charlie believes himself to be a genius janitor similar to Will Hunting from Good Will Hunting ("The Gang Reignites the Rivalry")
- Green Man, a green screen suit worn by Charlie in America's Next Paddy's Billboard Model Contest and The Gang Gets Invincible
- Charlie takes on the persona of Richard Grieco in Dee Made a Smut Film, dressing as him and replicating how he speaks.
While dressing up as these individuals, Charlie often loses track of reality and literally adopts their personality and idiosyncrasies. This inability to separate fantasy from reality is a trait shared by his alleged biological father Frank, who sometimes tells stories from the movie Rambo as if they happened to him ("Mac and Dennis: Manhunters").
For some reasons, Charlie believes himself to be very well versed in legal ceremony and practice. He claims that his specialty is "bird law" and is adamant that he be the legal representation for anyone in the Gang who is in a legal jam ("The Gang Exploits the Mortgage Crisis"). This often means he is faced head-to-head against The Lawyer.
He also created the character Greenman and frequently dons the costume.
Charlie will sometimes scheme to deceive the entire Gang in order to achieve his goals, especially in pursuit of the Waitress.
- Charlie pretended he was dying of cancer in a failed attempted to get the Waitress to sleep with him ("Charlie Has Cancer").
- Charlie tries to manipulate Dennis into sleeping with both Charlie's and Mac's mothers in an attempt to get the Waitress to sleep with him out of revenge ("Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom") .
- Charlie pretended to be in love with another woman in order to make the Waitress jealous ("Charlie and Dee Find Love").
- Charlie tried tricking Dee, Mac, and Frank out of their shares of the bar, but was interrupted by Dennis ("Charlie Rules the World").
He enjoys seeing the other members of The Gang embarrassed. In "Dennis and Dee's Mom Is Dead", he is eager to have someone read to him from Dee's middle school diary so he can laugh at her difficulties as a disabled adolescent.
Charlie is intensely patriotic:
- He is threatened by a North Korean bar, proclaiming it as "un-American" ("The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation").
- He helps throw a wrestling show, in order to support the troops returning from war ("The Gang Wrestles for the Troops").
- Charlie tries to convey his love for America by protesting ("Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass") .
Charlie may or may not be an atheist:
- He argues with Mac about religion frequently.
- The idea of a crucifix in the bar made him very angry/uncomfortable ("Sweet Dee Gets Audited").
- He hated having to go to church and is a believer that organized religion is a scam ("Charlie's Mom Has Cancer").
- He pretended to be a priest without guilt, basing most of his sermons on stereotypes ("The Gang Exploits a Miracle").
- Charlie did go to catholic school with Mac and in the same episode asks Mac about God's stance on blood tests. ("Charlie Wants An Abortion")
- Charlie's opinion of Mac's credibility diminished when Mac claimed evolution wasn't real, but after Mac's argument against it ("Reynolds vs. Reynolds: The Cereal Defense"), seems to have an ambiguous stance on religion, such as believing in demons ("Psycho Pete Returns"), Hell, and Purgatory ("The Gang Goes to Hell: Part Two").
Charlie was born on February 9, 1976, to Bonnie Kelly. Charlie's real father is almost certainly Frank Reynolds. Frank had a one night stand with Charlie's mother 30 years ago ("Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad"). Frank forced Charlie's mom to have an abortion but it "didn't take" and Charlie was born three months later. Bonnie says she had to keep it a secret from Frank because he was already married to Barbara Reynolds at the time. If Frank had found out he would have made Bonnie throw him in a dumpster ("The Gang Finds a Dumpster Baby").
As his mother didn't want him to go to the toilet alone when he was a little boy, she dressed him as girl so they could go together to the women's restroom. This is a habit Charlie adopted for decades, claiming he couldn't poop until cross-dresses, though he has decided to give that up. ("The Gang Solves the Bathroom Problem")
Charlie has at least one younger sister who is mentioned once. Two young girls are at Charlie's intervention but neither of them speaks or is named. When Charlie mentions his sister to the McPoyles, he states that she was at the intervention they had just left, but the only women other than the two girls pictured in the episode appear too old to be Charlie's sister(s). ("Charlie Got Molested").
Charlie's grandmother (Bonnie's mother) also appears at his intervention ("Charlie Got Molested"). She is never seen or heard from again in the series.
It has been repeatedly implied that Charlie was sexually abused as a child.
- When the McPoyle brothers claimed they were molested by Coach Murray, he had a strange reaction. He later admits he was never molested by Coach Murray to the police.
- Later, Charlie repeatedly wrote music about the "Nightman", a spirit-like being who crawled into his room at night when he was young and takes hold of him with his "strong hands", and "fills him up". The words Charlie uses to describe his transformation into the Nightman undoubtedly describes a violent rape by a man.
- Charlie is intensely uncomfortable around his Uncle Jack, who has small hands, often dodging physical contact with him. He also reacts negatively to memories of the two sharing a room when Charlie was a child.
Charlie's former sexual abuse is obvious to every character on the show except Charlie himself. While performing in Charlie's musical, most members of the Gang interprets the song as involving the rape of a small boy. Dee objects to singing her Coffee Shop Princess song as being about the molestation of a young boy. Frank interprets the Troll Toll Song as being about wanting "this boy's hole" instead of "this boy's soul", and Mac interpreted the same song to involve a rape scene, which he and Dennis worked hard to make "classy" ("The Nightman Cometh").
It is strongly suggested that the Nightman was actually Charlie's Uncle Jack. Further, the troll is almost certainly Charlie's mother, who was charging Uncle Jack rent to stay in her house. Charlie interprets this as Jack paying the "troll toll" ("The Great Recession").
When Dennis and Mac openly state Uncle Jack molested Charlie, however, Charlie unworriedly claims that he "dodged" him and maintains he's only ever been molested by Dee ("The Gang Misses the Boat", "Time's Up for the Gang"); taken at face value this would confirm that Uncle Jack has certainly attempted to sexually abuse him. This could of course be further levels of denial on Charlie's part, or he may be correct in that Uncle Jack never succeeded in his attempts but is unaware that it is still sexual assault if there was any physical contact at all.
In eighth grade, Charlie won a dance competition to "Take My Breath Away" by the band Berlin ("The Gang Dances Their Asses Off").
Charlie has mixed memories about how others perceived him in high school. At times he is oblivious to the fact that he wasn't considered cool ("The Waitress Is Getting Married"). Other times he remembers that he was called "Dirtgrub" and he would eat dirt and spiders to make the cool kids laugh to leave him alone. Even though Dennis and Dee also attended the same high school, they usually did not interact with Charlie. Although, Tim Murphy mentioned that Dennis was "never that cool to begin with", and that he would end up hanging out with "Dirt Grub" and "Ronny the Rat" (Mac) underneath the bleachers ("The High School Reunion"). In high school, Charlie, Mac, and "Psycho Pete' were in a group they called "Freight Train" ("The High School Reunion")("Psycho Pete Returns").
Skills and abilities
Despite his apparent lack of intelligence, Charlie has displayed some unexpected skills and abilities:
- Charlie survived an abortion. Charlie was aborted by his mother and three months later popped out "happy as a clam!" ("The Gang Finds a Dumpster Baby").
- Charlie's musical abilities are borderline professional - see the section below.
- Charlie can drink immense amounts of alcohol. He once drank 70 beers and still managed to hit a baseball on a rope to deep left field, as well as hold a (very slurred) conversation ("The Gang Beats Boggs").
- Charlie has a prodigious ability to handle drugs and sedatives. He can consume an enormous quantity of sedative-stuffed brownies ("The Gang Dances Their Asses Off").
- He enjoys cooking, which he often does on a hotplate in his apartment ("The Gang Goes Jihad").
- He is adept at sewing, which allows him to maintain the few pieces of clothing that he owns ("The Aluminum Monster vs. Fatty Magoo").
- Charlie is an acclaimed "great referee" ("Charlie Wants An Abortion") although he shows up drunk to referee a children's basketball team ("The Gang Gives Back").
- He also has a renowned method of cleaning toilets and urinals with his bare hands ("Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare").
- Despite his small size Charlie is capable of pulling a pick-up with Mac and Dennis in it ("Hundred Dollar Baby").
- He is extremely good at dominoes ("The Gang Gets Racist").
- He can eat an entire unripe pear in 17 seconds of air-time ("The Gang Hits the Road").
- He is apparently single-handedly keeping the bar from failing health inspections ("Charlie Work").
Charlie has also directed several video productions:
- A video of Dennis and Mac threatening jihad ("The Gang Goes Jihad")
- A video of Dennis to promote his run for office ("The Gang Runs for Office")
- A video of Sweet Dee being lit on fire ("Frank Sets Sweet Dee on Fire")
- A commercial for his product, Kitten Mittens ("Paddy's Pub: Home of the Original Kitten Mittens")
Dennis and Mac frequently manipulate Charlie into tests of his fortitude, such as hitting him over the head with beer bottles and chairs, or having him tow Dennis's Range Rover through the streets of Philadelphia. They consider Charlie to be almost impossible to injure ("Hundred Dollar Baby").
Charlie has survived Dennis running him over with a car ("Charlie Gets Crippled") and shooting him in the head ("Gun Fever"). Mac has also referred to Charlie as a survivor ("Charlie Rules the World").
Charlie is also surprisingly adept at concocting elaborate plans to achieve his desires ("Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom") . Similarly, he is able to correctly deduce and understand schemes that the rest of the Gang formulated and began without telling him. Simultaneously, he organizes and successfully executes an intricate plan to fraudulently pass a health inspection, all while fixing the mistakes the Gang made with their plot. His success goes entirely unnoticed by the rest of the Gang ("Charlie Work")
He has also intricately memorized and even mapped out the air ducts and vents throughout Paddy's Pub. It is stated that Charlie sometimes seeks refuge and solitude there. It is the only access to Charlie's "bad room", in which Charlie likes to go to "be alone and break bottles" ("The Gang Gets Held Hostage").
Charlie can hold his breath for over seven minutes, just short of the world record ("Dennis Looks Like a Registered Sex Offender"). Although he does blurt out a few words during this record attempt, suggesting he's not actually holding his breath properly.
Charlie is the most skilled musician in the group. He can write original music and sing it. Charlie wrote the music and most of the lyrics to the song Dayman and performed it with Dennis as part of their group, Electric Dream Machine. It is implied that Charlie never learned to play the keyboard and his ability to do so is an entirely natural - he claims that "keyboards just make sense to [him]". ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person")
He also wrote an entire musical in "The Nightman Cometh", including the following original songs:
He also wrote and performed several other songs:
- "The Nightman" ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person")
- "I Like Paddy's Pub" ("The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award")
- "Go Fuck Yourselves" ("The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award")
Besides writing music, he has also shown other music abilities:
- He has perfect pitch ("Charlie Work").
- He can play piano, harmonica, saxophone ("The Gang Hits the Slopes") and bugle. In several episodes, a guitar can be seen briefly in his apartment, hinting that he may also play the guitar. He has even been shown playing the keyboard and harmonica at once. ("The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award")
Charlie lives in poverty, partly caused by a tendency to make "bad investments" ("Gun Fever"). At one point, Charlie sells a "shit load" of his shares of Paddy's to Mac for half a sandwich. He sells half his shares to Mac ones for "goods and services" and sells the other half to Dennis, and never realizes that he does not own any portion of the bar until others piece it together for him. ("The Gang Sells Out")
Charlie has limited personal hygiene, and lives in abject squalor. Mac says that he has never seen Charlie put on deodorant, claims to see mites crawling all over him, and Charlie admits that he only washes his testicles every Friday ("The Gang Dances Their Asses Off"). The Waitress also noted once that Charlie "smell[s] really bad" ("The Gang Sells Out"). He often smells overwhelmingly of cheese ("The Waitress is Getting Married")("The Storm of the Century")("Charlie Work"), and casually handles horse feces or clogged toilets with his bare hands. ("The Gang Gets Whacked (Part 1)")("The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award")("Charlie Work"). He intentionally stepped in dog feces once and didn't step out of it, hoping that the smell of the feces would linger on him to cover the fact that he let a skunk spray him, which he did to hide the smell of cigarettes. ("Hero or Hate Crime?") He and Frank both eat cat food on the regular ("Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life")("Frank Falls Out the Window"), though he was once said to have breath that smells like dog food. ("Charlie Rules the World") Charlie does not own a toothbrush, ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person") which allows his teeth to slip out of his mouth with almost no resistance. ("Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)"). He and Frank have a penchant for the trash, which began in "The Gang Finds a Dumpster Baby". He never seems bothered about cleaning what he finds - he eats food directly from the garbage ("The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation"), wears clothes right after finding them, and keeps much of the trash directly on his bed. He uses the trash lying around his apartment to stop bleeding wounds. ("Mac and Dennis Break Up")
Charlie often exhibits difficulty reading and writing, and is often accused of being illiterate and "retarded" by other characters. Mac even went as far as claiming "No one understands the subtleties of Charlie's retardation better than me." Dennis suspects that Charlie might be dyslexic, because the scripts he writes often have words in an incomprehensible order ("The Gang Runs for Office"). Charlie misread a contract that resulted in his putting the bar at risk of being lost in a contest ("The Gang Dances Their Asses Off"). He was unable to write clear lyrics for his musical and needed help from Artemis ("The Nightman Cometh"). His writing is often shown as being unreadable to the rest of the gang due to it being composed of small pictures, symbols, and written in various color of crayons ("Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats").
Charlie has an unhealthy obsession with The Waitress, and will do anything for even the slightest chance he might win her over. To this end, he has thrown away perfectly good relationships ("Charlie and Dee Find Love"), kowtowed to doing all the Charlie Work on the threat Dennis will sleep with her ("Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom") , and picked a fight with a guy whom he believed to be dating her ("Who Got Dee Pregnant?")
Charlie is sometimes unable to comprehend what people are talking about ("The Gang Recycles Their Trash"), and he has a poor grasp of history and current events. He mentions that Israel is in a tough situation because of "that whole tsunami" and the "superdome thing" ("The Gang Goes Jihad") .
He also is shown being unable to understand the basic concept of electrocution. He has been shocked over 500 times trying to fix the circuit breaker in the bar, and still hadn't picked up on what was happening, according to Dennis ("The Gang Gets Whacked (Part 1)"). He also shocked himself repeatedly trying to get a piece of cheese, constantly brushing it off ("Flowers for Charlie").
Like Dee, he suffers from stage fright and becomes nauseated when performing in front of live audiences ("Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life"). He's afraid that people will boo him or hate him, and that's why he's never pursued his dreams ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person") . Despite these fears, however, he was able to perform in his own musical and propose to the Waitress in front of an audience ("The Nightman Cometh").
Charlie frequently abuses inhalants such as glue, spray paint, and bathroom cleaners, and poppers ("Underage Drinking: A National Concern") ("Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad") ("The High School Reunion") ("Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)") He shows complete disregard for laws at all times. (List of crimes committed by the gang)
After blowing up the building next door to the bar Charlie is ordered by the court to go to Alcoholics Anonymous after telling the judge he was drunk, which was true but also in the hope that it would get him off the hook. When arriving for his first meeting, Charlie enters drinking a beer. After the Waitress stops being his sponsor, Charlie responds by getting extremely drunk before refereeing a children's basketball game ("The Gang Gives Back").
Charlie has displayed a strong anxiety about leaving Philadelphia, which has lessened over the course of the season. In the first attempt we see him make to leave Philadelphia, in the episode "The Gang Hits the Road", his sense of panic about leaving Philadelphia leads to Dee's car being stolen. The places Charlie has been to now include (chronologically):
- Atlantic City in "The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods". Charlie is unconscious and put in the trunk of a car till they get to the titular woods, but manages to make it the rest of the way to Atlantic City awake (on a truck).
- Jersey Shore in "The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore". Charlie was rendered unconscious by Mac. He woke up half way there, upon which Mac put him out again. Charlie has no recollection of waking up in the middle.
- "Somewhere outside of Philadelphia", though presumably nearby, in "The Maureen Ponderosa Wedding Massacre". He makes it clear he is not happy about it.
- Los Angeles in "The Gang Beats Boggs", where he seems to have no trouble getting on a plane, though he has already drunk at that point.
- An "Unknown" waterbody in "The Gang Goes to Hell" and "Part Two". Though the location is not mentioned, it is implied that the cruise the gang goes on in is not in Philadelphia - Charlie says "I knew I shouldn't have come on this cruise ... I mean, it used to be I would never even leave Philly!". Also, there is no waterbody in Philadephia that resembles what is shown; Dennis also mentions the cruise ship's intended destination is the Bahamas.
- The Poconos in "The Gang Hits the Slopes". He remarks, as he stands atop a very difficult ski run holding beer bottles in place of ski poles, that this is why he hates to leave Philadelphia, but he apparently travelled with the rest of The Gang willingly.
In addition, Charlie has abused or been addicted to:
- Anabolic steroids ("Hundred Dollar Baby")
- Copious amounts of alcohol ("The Gang Gives Back")
- LSD, although only because Frank drugged him ("The Gang Gets Invincible")
- Glue ("Underage Drinking: A National Concern") ("Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad")
- Poppers ("Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)")
- Cocaine ("The Gang Gets Whacked (Part 1)")
- Spray paint ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person")
- Turpentine, according to Mac's confession ("How Mac Got Fat")
- Ketamine ("Making Dennis Reynolds a Murderer")
- See also: Charlie and Dee, Charlie and Frank, Charlie and Dennis, Charlie and Mac, Charlie and the Waitress
Charlie has had little success in dating, and spends much of his spare time stalking the Waitress. He has even hired a spy to watch the Waitress ("Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life"). He goes to great lengths to win her over, in spite of her declarations that she will never be interested in him, and even her 50 foot restraining order ("Charlie and Dee Find Love").
Charlie seems to believe that the relationship he has with The Waitress is normal and is the way that a relationship is supposed to go. When he tells Ruby Taft that he was merely using her to make The Waitress jealous, he says, after noting she banged him "almost instantly", that "a quality woman doesn't do that; she doesn't say 'yes' right away; she says 'no' to a man, for years, like ten years" ("Charlie and Dee Find Love"). However, the Waitress herself could barely be referred as "quality woman" this way, given how she banged Dennis so quickly ("Charlie Has Cancer").
Charlie finally, after what Dee refers to as 15 years, gets some attention from the Waitress after he convinces her that he's the person she could have the baby she's always wanted with, and the two sleep together. Soon after, however, Charlie gets cold feet and leaves the Waitress at his apartment when she starts expressing concerns with their living conditions, saying that it's one thing to trap someone with a baby, and another thing to BECOME trapped by the baby. After getting numerous phone calls from the Waitress, he decides he should ghost her. ("Dennis' Double Life")
Charlie presumably lost his virginity to Stacy Corvelli in high school. She shows up a decade or so later and tricks him into thinking he fathered her son, Tommy. Tommy is actually the son of another high school classmate, Jimmy Doyle ("Charlie Wants an Abortion"). A deleted scene in the Season Five DVD hints that Stacy is the only woman he has ever slept with until that point, and that it may have been a traumatic experience for him.
Until Season Eight, Charlie was the only member of The Gang who had not had sex during the present time of the series. His relationship with Ruby Taft broke this "record" ("Charlie and Dee Find Love").
Charlie bangs a Bulgarian "model" named Tatiana while on a ski trip, but it later turns out she was a prostitute hired by Frank. ("The Gang Hits the Slopes")
Charlie finally convinces the Waitress to have sex with him, by telling her they could have a baby together, something she's always wanted. ("Dennis' Double Life")
Charlie participates in a three way/orgy consisting of himself, Mac, Frank, and a sex doll that looked like Dennis ("The Gang Makes Paddy's Great Again").
In Season 14, Frank and Charlie sleep with two European backpackers that replace their Austrian Air bnb renters, Alexi and Nikki 
He has come close to banging several women:
- Janelle Jenkins — He dated Janelle to prove to The Waitress that he was not a racist, and Janelle was legitimately interested in him ("The Gang Gets Racist").
- The Waitress — Mac and Dennis paid her to sleep with Charlie, but he didn't make a move on her ("Charlie Has Cancer"). Later, he wasn't quick enough to say a word to her when she claimed "I'm gonna bang the next person who talks to me" before Schmitty popped in ("The High School Reunion, Part 2: The Gang's Revenge") .
- Prostitutes — it was not shown whether or not Charlie banged one or more prostitutes when partying with Frank's money. Mac affirmed that "...services have already been rendered" ("Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare").
- Sun-Li — Sun-Li followed him home and moved into his apartment, but he didn't even kiss her, though they were briefly engaged. Charlie later discovered that she was only 12 years old ("The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation").
- Painted girls at fraternity — two girls painted Charlie and Mac, and were going to let them return the favor before showering together to wash the paint off (presumably leading to sex). But before Charlie and Mac could paint them back, the heads of the fraternity kicked them out ("The Gang Reignites the Rivalry").
Charlie has been caught masturbating by several members of the gang. Dee caught him masturbating to Dennis's cartoon drawings of large breasted women ("The Aluminum Monster vs. Fatty Magoo"). She also accused him of stealing Dennis's erotic memoir in order to masturbate to its pictures, since he couldn't read the text ("Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life"). Frank also mentioned that he likes to hide inside of the apartment couch in order to catch Charlie "pounding off" ("A Very Sunny Christmas"). When Charlie reveals to Frank that he awoke to him doing some "pretty frantic research of [his] own" one night, Frank countered by saying that the two could go "tit-for-tat on that one" ("Mac Is a Serial Killer").
Charlie and Frank get married so Charlie can benefit from Frank's medical insurance and so Frank can rest secure that Charlie would not pull the plug if Frank fell into a coma ("Mac Fights Gay Marriage").
- Charlie Day and Mary Elizabeth Ellis (The Waitress) are actually married in real life.
- Charlie has a dislike for lizards (The Gang Gets Invincible) and people's knees ("The Waitress Is Getting Married").
- Charlie's favorite food is "milk steak", his favorite hobby is "magnets", and he really likes ghouls. "You know, funny little green ghouls" ("The Waitress is Getting Married").
- Charlie has an unhealthy love for cheese, especially in stressful situations, however, when he is presented with cottage cheese he has no idea what it is and calls it an "enticing bowl of white." (The Gang Goes On Family Fight)
- Charlie claims he has never eaten blueberries or strawberries before, and he never had a pear until "The Gang Hits the Road". He has, however, eaten both raccoon and monkey meat (Mac & Dennis: Manhunters).
- Charlie is 5'5.25" (165.7 cm).
- Charlie had never left Philly before The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods (he did it again in The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore, The Gang Beats Boggs, and The Gang Goes to Hell).
- Charlie eats cat food in order to pass out and sleep through the noise of fifty cats howling outside his window every night ("Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life").
- Charlie doesn't own a toothbrush ("Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person") .
- This is also possibly why Charlie's teeth come out so easily when pulling on them, due to the fact that he never brushes his teeth. ("Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)")
- Charlie did not believe that jockeys were real and, after finding out that they are real, he is astonished that they can speak ("The Gang Gets Whacked (Part 1)").
- Charlie's name has been used in the titles of multiple different episodes.
- Season One: "Charlie Wants An Abortion", "Charlie Has Cancer", "Charlie Got Molested"
- Season Two: "Charlie Gets Crippled", "Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass"
- Season Four: "Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)", "Mac and Charlie Die (Part 2)"
- Season Five: "Mac and Charlie Write a Movie"
- Season Six: "Mac and Charlie: White Trash", "Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats"
- Season Seven: "Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games"
- Season Eight: "Charlie and Dee Find Love", "Charlie's Mom Has Cancer", "Charlie Rules the World"
- Season Nine : "Flowers for Charlie"
- Season Ten : "Charlie Work", Ass Kickers United: Mac and Charlie Join A Cult"
- Season Eleven: "Chardee MacDennis 2: Electric Boogaloo", "Charlie Catches a Leprechaun"
- Season Thirteen: "Charlie's Home Alone"
- It's believed that Charlie's play "The Nightman Cometh" is to be a reflection of his childhood, given that most parts of the play are very similar to his past.
- Charlie was believed to sexually abused by his uncle, and the play features a believed rape scene.
- Charlie's mother was believed to be a prostitute, and the play features a troll who is misheard by the audience to be prostituting the protagonist to the Nightman.
- Charlie's original motive was to seduce the Waitress with the play; and in the play, it features a love scene with a princess seemingly modelled after her. Indicating a Madonna-Whore complex.
- Charlie's mother rented Charlie's room to his uncle similar to the "troll's toll".
- The only thing that isn't part of Charlie's history is the fight between the Day Man and the Night Man, so this can be interpreted as Charlie's desire to defend himself or to get revenge on his uncle. The only contributing evidence to this is Charlie's physical discomfort around his uncle and his apparent Stockholm syndrome.
- Further interpretations by fans have suggested that the reason Charlie wanted Mac to play Day Man is because he was there for Charlie during his childhood while Dennis has both slept with the Waitress and displays sexual deviance, something Charlie associates with the Night Man.
- The song also displays Charlie's lack of comprehension towards the assault as it goes into detail about how his uncle raped him. He also shows signs of Stockholm Syndrome towards his uncle due to his lack of understanding.
- Many fans have speculated that Charlie is sex-repulsed and/or asexual (or on the asexual spectrum), and that he may have serious commitment issues for several reasons
- in this deleted scene from "Mac and Charlie Write a Movie", he stated that he finds sex weird and that the last and only time he made it (up until this episode) he found it gross. Besides that, he was about 35 years old in when this episode was aired and if until there the last time he had made sex was in high school, it means he was celibate for about 17 years.
- his general lack of sex and dating in the course of the series
- the only times he had sex during the series (and his life, according to the deleted scene) where with Stacy Corvelli, during highschool (and he stated in the deleted scene that it was gross), with Ruby Taft (whom he was using to get to The Waitress and mocked for wanting to have sex with him too soon) in "Charlie and Dee Find Love", with Dee (who raped him), in "The Gang Misses the Boat" and with The Waitress (whom he was obsessed with and was shown to want to start a family and have babies in "The Gang saves the Day", but imediatelly lost interest after having sex) in "Dennis' Double Life".
- The only actual romantic interests he had during the series where The Waitress (whom he was unhealthily obsessed with and gets freaked out imediatelly after they have sex) and maybe Sun-Li (they were engaged but never kissed or slept together)
- He tells Dennis that he finds kissing people gross in "The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation"
- In his dream about his idealized future with The Waitress showed in "The Gang Saves the Day" he wants to have children with her, but instead of thinking about sleeping with her he instead get them at the "baby store"
- Even if he doesn't fully understands or remembers it, he still clearly disturbed by the sexual assault he suffered from his uncle. That's something that could have caused him to have relashionship issues or lack of interest
- A major element of Charlie's character is his poverty, shown often through his extremely limited wardrobe. Case in point: out of 134 episodes, he wears his green army jacket in 53 episodes, his track jacket in 28, and his McGregor hoodie in 22.
- His Vans high-tops, meanwhile, seem to be his only shoes, appearing at least once in every single episode with the exceptions of "The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods"(where he wears dress shoes only), "The Gang Goes to Hell: Part Two"(where he only wears his Gilligan costume and a robe),"The Gang Goes to a Water Park"(where he is in a swimsuit all day), "The Janitor Always Mops Twice" (where he is dressed as a film noir detective with dress shoes) and "Waiting for Big Mo" (where he only wears his barefoot glove-shoes).
- Charlie has perfect pitch: he identifies the note on the carbon monoxide detector as a G# without any reference pitch (shown in the episode "Charlie Work").
- Charlie is right-handed.
- Charlie has been known to drink and eat unusual things, for example, Charlie enjoys drinking paint, which has resulted in him seeing hallucinations such as a leprechaun flying away on a rainbow ("Charlie Catches a Leprechaun"). He also eats stickers ("The Gang Hits the Road"), wants to eat an eraser ("The Gang Gets a New Member") and eats chalk because he claims that it settles his stomach ("Dee Made a Smut Film"). He also sometimes chews and swallows bouncy balls to "test" if they're edible, which Dennis says is just eating them regardless ("Waiting for Big Mo")
- Charlie's favorite board game is "Hungry Hungry Hippos" ("Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games).
- Charlie considers violent movies to be the best movies ("Gun Fever Too: Still Hot").
- Charlie's most cherished possession in his apartment is his hot plate ("Dennis Looks Like a Registered Sex Offender").
- Charlie has had a sexual encounter with every member of the Gang as of Season 14:
- Dee and Charlie make out and have sex (nonconsensual in Charlie's case) in The Gang Misses the Boat.
- Charlie, Frank, and Mac participate in a three way/orgy with a Dennis sex Doll (while Dee watches) in The Gang Makes Paddy's Great Again.
- Dennis and Charlie are forced to kiss like "...two souls desperate to taste the juices of passion." (Dee Day)
- See also: Category:Images of Charlie Kelly