"Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad" is the tenth and final episode of the second season of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.


Dennis and Dee discover the MySpace page of the man who turns out to be their real father. Meanwhile, Charlie and Mac visit Mac's convict father in jail.


8:00 AM on a Monday

On MySpace, Dee has received a friend request from a guy named Bruce Mathis that is claiming to be her and Dennis' father. They have lunch with Frank and their mother Barbara to sort out this rumor and Barbara announces that Bruce is their biological father. This sends Frank on a rant which ends in a stroke.

Dennis and Dee meet with Bruce to see what he is like. He is a very nice and giving individual who has dedicated his whole life to helping other people. They attend a fundraiser with him and have a great time. They try to convince their mother to get back together with him and they all meet at a hospital. They all try to give hope to sick children, but Dee, Dennis, and Barbara realize they don't care enough to be philanthropic.

Meanwhile, Mac and Charlie try to connect with Mac's father Luther who has been in prison for Mac's whole life. Luther asks them to smuggle heroin into prison. Instead, they try to be tough by helping Frank beat up Bruce. Mac and Charlie approach Bruce with a baseball bat after the fundraiser but Mac chickens out and Charlie is left to awkwardly take a picture of Bruce up close. They decide to lie to Frank and tell him that they bashed him, after which they drive away quickly.

At Charlie's apartment Frank prepares for a date with a one-night-stand he had 30 years ago. Dennis and Dee enter, asking Frank to be their father again because they didn't want to be as charitable as Bruce. He says no and answers the door to get his date -- Bonnie Kelly. Charlie slowly puts the pieces together in his head: he doesn't know who his father is and Frank slept with his mother 30 years ago.


  • Dennis and Dee - Team up to find their real father.
  • Charlie and Mac - Team up to prove Mac's father that they are "hard" (by smuggling heroin into the prison).


Mini-Dee Reynolds   We have to talk with you about something, Dad.
Shoot.   Mini-Frank Reynolds
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   It's kind of disturbing.
You two aren't banging, are you?   Mini-Frank Reynolds
Mini-Dee Reynolds   What?
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   No. What are you talking about?
Mini-Dee Reynolds   That's disgusting.
Yeah, it is. Stay away from that kind of thing. No good can come from it, trust me.   Mini-Frank Reynolds
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   That's not what we're here to talk about.
You better not be, because I don't want no uuhrg grandkids.   Mini-Frank Reynolds
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   I'm not banging my sister!
Jesus Christ, what have I walked into here?   Mini-Barbara Reynolds
Mini-Dee Reynolds   Oh my God.
You two aren't having sex together...?   Mini-Barbara Reynolds
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   No, we're not having sex together.
What the hell is she doing here?!   Mini-Frank Reynolds
Mini-Dee Reynolds   Sit down, please, Mom.
I'm not getting pulled into any sort of perverted sex talk.   Mini-Barbara Reynolds
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   It's not perverted.
Banging your sister is perverted, Dennis!   Mini-Frank Reynolds
Mini-Dennis Reynolds   I'M NOT BANGING MY SISTER!



Mini-Mac   Well, maybe it boils down to this, smart guy: Computers are for losers.
You're drinking a beer at 8:00 in the morning!   Mini-Dennis Reynolds
Mini-Mac   Whatever, dude. Irrelevant.



Mini-Charlie Kelly   This is bullshit. You guys have two dads and I don't even have one.



Mini-Frank Reynolds   Barbara, your turkey-neck is looking exceptionally attractive tonight.
You have turned into a retarded person.   Mini-Barbara Reynolds
Mini-Frank Reynolds   You're a retard!



Mini-Barbara Reynolds   Children, would you have liked to have been aborted?



Mini-Frank Reynolds   Keep it down? Don't make a scene! Oh no, I'm not going to make a scene. I was just told -- excuse me -- that my horrible whore wife has tricked me into raising two bastards for 30 years and I'm being asked to not back a scene. Oh, excuse me, did you bang my wife? Did you bang my whore wife? Does anybody have any illegitimate children with my whore wife that I don't know about?!



Mini-Luther Mac   What do you guys know about smuggling heroin through your anus?



Mini-Mac   Did you send him a friend request?
I don't want to be his friend, I want to shoot him in the face!   Mini-Frank Reynolds



Mini-Mac   Do you want to shove heroin into your ass?
Dude, I don't want to shove anything in my ass!   Mini-Charlie Kelly
Mini-Mac   All right! This is the perfect opportunity to prove how hard we are, and not have to shove anything up our asses!



Mini-Dennis Reynolds   We went to this Lupus event last night. Lupus is AWESOME.



Mini-Dennis Reynolds   Oh, no, we weren't talking about you. We were talking about your sick and dying friend in the next bed.
Season 2 Episodes
  1. "Charlie Gets Crippled"
2. "The Gang Goes Jihad"
3. "Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare"
4. "Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom"
5. "Hundred Dollar Baby"
6. "The Gang Gives Back"
7. "The Gang Exploits A Miracle"
8. "The Gang Runs for Office"
 9. "Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass"
10. "Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad"
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